Thursday, December 13, 2012

Modern Day Motherhood

A friend of mine posted this article on facebook. A few of these things have been on my mind a lot lately. It offers a good perspective. I've never thought of our generation as pioneers before. The author's perspective most definitely validates my own resentment every time I hear "Well, I did it with my kids, and they survived." Every time I hear it I want to scream at whoever says it. THINGS HAVE CHANGED. There is new research, new resources, new pressures, and new legislature. Of course instead of screaming "I'LL RAISE MY KIDS HOW I THINK IS BEST, LEAVE ME ALONE", I either say nothing or say "That's not how I'm doing it".

Am I the only one these days who feels that I have to recite a dissertation of reasons why I make a decision on how I'm raising my kids? Am I alone in my psychoticism {yes, that's a word... I just made it up}  or do any of you parents out there feel this way? 

Anyway, this article was good. I hadn't thought about the expectations of society affecting how we parent, or some of the other things she pointed out. 

DISCLAIMER: There is a little profanity... some is bleeped out though. 

I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. 

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Beautiful Imperfections


Christmas is in full swing in the Shaw household {and everywhere, really}. Tree up- check, Our family Elf on the Shelf Oswald {Ozzie} is in town- check, shopping done-almost check, lights up-check.

I let Bailey help me decorate the tree this year. No big deal, right? WRONG. Those who know me well, know that I can be a perfectionist, to say the least. I like walking in and seeing things pretty and realizing the pictures in my head.

The kids are getting old enough that I thought, it's time they get to participate. {I let Bailey help with the tree while the others napped. It's all my nerves could take}.

I'm not going to lie, it drives me dang near INSANE to see that tree look like its been ransacked, {it looks much worse now, than it did in those pictures} literally gives me anxiety if I think about it for too long.

However, when I look at it I also think it's beautiful. She was so proud of herself for putting on the ornaments by herself and stringing the bead garland on. It's memories like this that she will remember when she is grown. She will {hopefully} be grateful she got to be a part of holiday decorating, without me harping at her about doing it all wrong... even though I felt the urge constantly. It's those memories that will inspire her to share and make her own memories, when she has her own children.

I'm grateful that my mom included us in these things. I'm glad she put forth the effort, it takes a lot of patience, that I just don't have. She does it with my kids, too. That quality time makes such a difference. Seriously, My kids are different kids when they are out at my moms.

 I need to be better at it. I remember decorating the tree and stringing popcorn and cranberry garlands {and eating the popcorn off}, baking treats, making decorations {snowflakes, dough ornaments, etc}, and Dollar Store shopping for each other, to name a few.

The inclusion created/creates an anticipation of the season and helps it to feel magical for kids. I get lazy with the Santa facade sometimes and just want to tell them the truth. Then I remember the many Christmas Eves my brothers  and I would spend wide awake, going back and forth between our rooms and taking turns checking the tree, to see if Santa had come and snooping to see if we could tell what he had brought us, in just the dim colored lights of the Christmas Tree, and without making the set up look disturbed {close longest run-on sentence, ever}.  Some of the better memories I have from my often contentious childhood are during the holidays and I treasure them.

Those memories are much more beautiful than a picture perfect Christmas tree and/or decorations... and they make the lurking panic attack go away.

I'm making it a point to include the kids more and be more pleasant.I'm trying not to worry about the insignificant and focus on what matters... quality time. I'm not always successful, but I get an E for the effort, right?? RIGHT??

Go make some memories!

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Mugs on Monday

I saw this posted on Pinterest a while back {and pinned it}. I thought I'd let the kids have a little fun. I needed SOMETHING to entertain them.

I have all white dishes and they have dwindled down to only 3 plates left, 6 or 7 saucers, 6 bowls, and a full set of mugs {until today}.

Since mugs aren't used that often, I decided to bust out the colored sharpies I got during back to school and let the kids have some fun. My table was a casualty... Bailey decided to execute a late Picasso-like piece of work on it. So much for selling it, like I'd planned. Anyhow, I baked it in the oven, just like it said to. My oven only goes down to 170 degrees, so that's what I baked it at for about 20-30 minutes. I didn't actually time it.

They came out, and the sharpie came off when my nail accidentally scratched it. I'm going to try again and see if it will permanently set. I put them back in later on at 350 for about half an hour and now it is set and doesn't scratch off. So easy!

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Feta-Spinach-Quinoa Salad

This is AMAZING. I actually bought the Quinoa to mill it and make flour for the kids. It's high protein and low carb. I got a 2 pound bag of organic Quinoa for $5.00 at BJ's. That's a pretty dang good price.

So I decided to put some chicken stock in a pot and cook some. I had a ton of spinach in the fridge that needed used, so I made a little salad... spinach, tomato, and lots of feta cheese {my favorite is the Garlic & Herb flavored}, and then tossed in a good bit of Quinoa. To compliment that I tossed a couple chicken breasts in a pan with a little olive oil, added half a bottle of Newman's Own Balsamic Vinaigrette and let them cook a while, flipping  after a few minutes on each side and then again about 10 minutes or so in.
This was AWESOME. The chicken is great, but nothing new, I do that a lot.

But the Quinoa salad. MAN, it was good. I seriously almost devoured Jeffrey's too.

It was sitting there, staring at me, as he spent some quality, keep-her-from -crying-long-enough-so-I-can-eat-time, with Adeline.

It took serious restraint. Definitely a new favorite. AND it's Gluten Free/ Casein Free.

Saturday, November 17, 2012

Sneaky Leeky Potato Soup! {GF/CF/SF}


Guys- this stuff is YUM.

Let me just be honest for a minute... once everything was in and it was cooking... it didn't smell like it was going to be very good. In fact, I texted Mr. Shaw on his way home and warned him that it probably was a botched dinner. True Story. Remember... I'm not very good at experimenting with food. I also don't like to taste as I go along... I go by smell. I also am scared of dairy free products... no lie. OH, the irony.

However, it tastes exactly how I wanted it to! Warm, rounded, rich flavor... but it's way healthier than you're average potato soup. Also, its, Gluten Free, Dairy Free, Soy Free!!! Meaning, my entire family could eat this {if only they would}. Bailey and Callen tasted it and liked it.

Don't get freaked out by the ingredients... I promise, it's good. I have pretty high standards, and I'm super picky, though, everyone has their own taste buds... I guess. 

Ok. Here you go.


1 qt. SWANSON'S Veggie broth 
1 qt. SWANSON'S Chicken broth
1 qt. Blue Diamond unsweetened, original almond milk
a bunch of po-tay-toes, peeled and dice {prob 10-12) I used russet, it's what I had
2 leeks sliced thinly and rinsed {green part and all} 
2 C. cauliflower chopped fairly small {I didn't actually measure it.. but it's approximate} 
3 cloves whole garlic, peeled
a dash or two of thyme
salt and pepper to taste
1/2-3/4 C. Earth's best vegan spread {i use the soy free one}
     I'm going to refer to this as butter- but it is not.... it's just shorter to type.


{DON'T skimp on the Swanson's... it really makes a difference!}

Melt the butter in the bottom of a stock pot. Add the sliced leeks, some salt and pepper, thyme and the garlic. Let them cook down on a  medium or med/high heat {between 7-10 minutes or so... I don't keep track}.

Add the chicken and veggie stocks, potatoes, cauliflower and let boil until it starts turning mushy... adding some salt, pepper and thyme to taste as you go. Probably about 30 minutes. 

Stick that junk in the blender and pulse a few times... {I had to do two batches} and then put it back in the pot. OR- If you have an immersion blender... thats the easier way to go! It will have a similar consistency to mashed potatoes. 

Put it back in the pot and add the almond milk until it's the consistency you want. Let it heat through {it will probably be hot enough you won't have to worry about that}

BAM! You're done. 

You can thank me later. 

OH. This makes, A LOT. I made a lot so I could freeze some in a ziploc for a quick lunch or dinner another time.

I just busted some leftovers out the other day and had them for lunch. And it was awesome all over again! 

Tuesday, October 30, 2012


Woo hoo!  The time has come... fall. My FAVORITE and most unproductive time of year! The time of year when we all want to bust out our cozy pajamas and slippers, and live off of soup and hot chocolate. Here in sunny Florida, it doesn't get super cool until about January... except for an occasional cold day here or there. 

Well, we have a whole week of cold weather! Highs in the 60's and lows in the mid 30's. For us this is a nice break from the 80's and 90's. 

{on a side note, I really think something recently set up shop in our fireplace, and it's borderline freaking me out.}

So, I made Vegetable Beef Soup last night... It wasn't my best, but Mr. Shaw seemed to like it, because he kept telling me over and over how good it was. Granted my hormones are so jacked up right now, things aren't tasting right, anyway. 

Here's the recipe. {I'll post the picture when blogger stops being ridiculous and let's me.} 

Vegetable Beef Soup
1-2 lbs stewing beef {or chuck roast cut up} same thing
1 carton SWANSON Beef broth {don’t skip on the Swanson, it really makes a difference}
1 can Swanson Vegetable Broth
1 can diced tomatoes {w/ juice}
3 large carrots peeled and sliced
1 large russet potato peeled and cubed
1 medium onion cut like you’d slice an apple
3-4 stalks celery sliced
3-4 cloves garlic chopped fine-ish
1 can green beans {w/ juice}
1 can corn {w/ juice}
~1/2 c. elbow macaroni or pasta of your choice
thyme {my FAVORITE}
salt and pepper to taste

Brown the stew meat a little, on medium heat with some salt, garlic powder, pepper, and toss in the celery and onion with it. add the broths, veggies and seasonings. I just sprinkle it in until it smells right to me. Turn the heat up to medium high and let it boil until the carrots and potatoes are softened {about an hour-ish} Toss in some macaroni noodles {or rice or whatever you want} let them get to your desired softness and dig in. 

Stay tuned, because there will be more soups to come! Until it gets hot again.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

The BEST Chocolate Chip Cookies.

Now, everyone has their cookie "type". Mine is chewy. These are simply the best cookies I've had/made to date. They are so rich and flavorful. I've made... 4-5 batches in the past month or so. No, I'm not kidding. I make about a dozen and then put the rest of the dough in ziplocs and freeze it. That dough never sees the light of the oven. We {Jeffrey and I} devour it before it makes it that far. It's seriously the best. Want me to shut up now, so that you can go make some? DO IT. 

Let me tell you one thing, though. Pay attention to her notes. Particularly the sea salt. Seriously, don't use table salt. The sea salt MAKES these cookies {and any others, honestly}. 

That, and DO NOT over bake them. In my oven, about 10 minutes seems to be perfect. So find what works for yours. Remember that they keep baking on the cookie sheet, so while they look undercooked, they will be perfect after they cool. 

Okay, go make these cookies. You can thank me later! Then, thank Alice Currah, for making this amazing recipe! 

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Pumpkin Patch!

We took the kids to the pumpkin patch last night. 'Cause you know I've gotta get some fall pictures! It was rough. I don't think I would ever be a child photographer... it's WAY too much work. Seriously. I don't have the patience for that mess!

This would have been SO much better if the sun hadn't come out RIGHT as I snapped this picture and made Bailey's hair glow blindingly, but I liked the shot anyhow. 

Same with this one... on the pumpkin.

He's been in a rough mood the last few days. I'm not sure what the deal is. 

 Callen was climbing down and fussing. I offered him a piece of candy and he smiled, jumped up there and put this innocent little look on his face. {I just remembered that I forgot to give him the candy. I guess he forgot too.} DOUBLE win for me!

My beauties.

This one is my FAVORITE.

Anyway, here are some of the ones I was able to get. Enjoy! I think we will be carving our big pumpkin tomorrow. I'll post pictures after I clean off my SD card, 'cause it's full.

Our Punkin' is 2 months!

I would love to have stats for you. I forgot about her appointment on Friday and made other plans; so, I had to cancel it. It will be a couple of weeks before we go back. She is definitely growing like a weed though! She FINALLY, has gotten to where she will sit alone in the bouncer or swing for 10-15 minutes and doesn't cry because she isn't being held at all times. She has pretty much slept through the night from the get go. THAT is pure mercy and awesomeness. She is SO smiley and sweet and happy. She doesn't like sitting in a wet or poopy diaper. So she pretty much cries when she is hungry, soiled, or tired. She farts like a man, so there is the occasional gas cry, as well. She's pure sugar... sweet as can be, and MELLOW. So far anyway. I am PRETTY dang excited about the prospects for a mellow child. She does have a temper. She still won't take a pacifier and isn't a fan of the bottle. She will take the bottle if she's super desperate and it has breast milk in it. Formula, however... she gets downright offended, insulted, and just pissed. Honestly, though... it's Alimentum. That junk is pretty gross. 

I couldn't decide between the first and last picture... you tell me... which one is the keeper, and don't say both... not an option... I'm running out of room to store pictures... I've got to start narrowing it down.

Picture 1 or 3 people?

Tuesday, October 16, 2012


We have been having a serious overdose of the terrible two's lately. I am at a loss for how to even handle this boy {Trevor}. Spanking doesn't work... and we've been doing that a lot lately. Generally I reserve spanking for things that are dangerous. The poor kid hates getting them, but once it's over and he's back to mischief, he forgets until he hears the words. By mischief I mean things like, ooooh, ya know:

Unbuckling his car seat... and I don't mean the harness, I mean the actual seatbelt that holds his car seat in. Thank you Nissan for only putting ONE latch system in the back of the car... idiots. Trevor thinks it's hilarious and fun for him to flop his car seat all around and manipulate it while we are en route. Which means, I have to stop the car, unbuckle him, pull his pants down and give him three spankings. Then pull up his pants, buckle him back, re-buckle the seatbelt and start driving again... just to do it all over a little while later.

Running down the road... he also thinks it's fun to unlock the dead bolt and go out the front door. Usually he just goes out front and turns on the water hose and plays in it. He's graduated to running down the road, laughing all the while. My mom was watching the kids for a couple of hours a week or so ago, and he did this. Bailey and mom were flipping out because they couldn't find him. Mom went out side, and low and behold, he was running down the street. But wait, there's more, two of the neighbor ladies saw him and were trying to catch him to get him out of the road. This, of course, freaked him out. So, he started running hysterically. Once mom got him, it took a while to calm him down. You would think that would have served as an adequate deterrent. NOPE. Homeslice ran away from me the other day. OF COURSE, he gets his but beat for pulling crap like that. Doesn't deter him, though.

Eating my brown sugar... yep. This boy skips out on the non existent cookie jar, and goes straight for the goods. He climbs up on the counter {sans chair or stool}, unscrews the lid and goes to town with both hands eating my brown sugar. Bailey did this too, I can't blame them, it's delish, though raw like that, makes me want to gag a bit.

Climbing up the garage door... you heard me, all the way to the top. Though, it's pretty easy to do, with the ledges and all... and he's done worse.

Violence... he thinks it's awesome, to pull handfuls of Bailey's hair out. Which I'm sure does hurt, but when she gets frustrated, she does that to her self. She has since she was younger than Trev. Still, it 's just mean. This morning, they were both laying on the floor and I heard her start crying and walked in the room and he was kicking the crap out of her face non-stop. Seriously, he was doing the back stroke, sans hands, on her face. MAN, was I PISSED. Talk about restraint.... it took some not to beat him. Instead I picked him up by his legs and carried him to his bed and plopped him on there and shut the door. He KNEW, he was on the verge of serious trouble. It's not just her. It's Callen and his friends, too. I mean part of it's just the testosterone and age. It's still unacceptable, regardless.

Drugs... for over a year he's been able to open child proof lids. Who designed those things anyway? They should be fired. In fact, I gave Bails some Tylenol earlier so her face wouldn't hurt so bad. Stupid me forgot to put it back up in the cabinet and I walked in the kitchen and there he was, guzzling. So, I'm freaking out. Thank goodness for the internet. These sites were helpful in determining how much is too much. Mayo Clinic and Yahoo Answers. It also helps to pay attention to where the crystallization on the bottle ends. That way you can determine how full the bottle actually was. There were 160mg in 5ml. The acceptable amount {91mg/lb of body weight}, is far above the amount that he took, thank goodness. He took about 5mls. I'm sure a tummy ache is in store... but thank goodness I knew that quiet is never good when Trev is around. I wish he'd just been in the sugar again...

The Ipad... he has figured out that if he takes all of the pillows off of our bed and piles them on the floor between Jeffrey's dresser and the bed, that, he can, in fact, stand on them, climb on the dresser, get the ipad, and get back on the bed.

Tattoos... He found a pen, got on my bed and drew all over his arms and legs. When I looked at him, he says, "What? I just drawing on my body like Uncle Chad...". My little brother just got a new tattoo and I guess Trevor saw it and well, that's pretty logical in the eyes of a two year old, so I didn't punish him. I just explained that we don't write on ourselves.

So yeah, I've been on my toes and frustrated beyond belief. These are just Trev's shenanigans. It doesn't even touch on all the tantrums, lack of focus, impulsivity and foul attitudes of Bailey, or the mimicking that Callen does when he sees Trev doing them {like hitting and pulling hair, or climbing to the back of the van instead of in his car seat, or fighting me when I try to buckle him in}.

Fun times, folks. FUN times.

Saturday, October 6, 2012

General Conference

In case you haven't figured it out yet, I'm a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints  or in other words I'm a mormon.

Twice a year we have what's called General Conference. In April and October we get to hear our Prophet and Apostles and other leaders in the church speak via satellite. I LOVE listening to the talks. There is such a sweet, peaceful feeling to the meetings. It lifts me up and gives me wisdom, understanding and perspective. 

If you are curious about what we believe, now's a good time to listen. There are different ways you can listen now, thanks to technology. You can watch it on the BYU Channel if you have satellite TV. You can also stream it on the internet. 

So I thought I'd invite you to take a peak and see what we're all about. How often do you get to hear a living prophet speak?

Sunday, September 30, 2012

GF Baking Helps

So, I'm about to make {or attempt to} make a decent loaf of bread for the kids. I really want to get Trev to eat it again, but with his yeast sensitivity {and oats} it presents a small {but feels SO large} challenge.

Here are some Gluten Free baking tips I've found:

First, you can substitute equal parts baking soda and lemon juice instead of yeast.

Also, I found that you can similarly use powdered Vitamin C {ascorbic acid} and baking powder. 

Here is just some dang good information to know when attempting to bake gluten free.

GF baking tips... you must read this.

This is a good one too. Talks about the use of gums.

Hope this helps lighten the load a little. I'm just going to use what I have on hand today, but I will probably experiment with some different things in the future. I'll let you know the results.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Milk Allergies

Wow. I stumbled upon this website this morning. It's called Go Dairy Free.

It has a really thorough section with the research and information on food allergies. It has some recipes. It's a really great resource sight. I started reading up on milk allergy information. WOW. Some of this I have been wondering, some I knew and some described my flipping kids to a T.

Take a look... it's good information to know.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Allergy Free, Gah!

Well, the time has come... for our household to go allergy free. Gah! The thought is so overwhelming it makes me a little nauseous, literally. Not to mention, the thought of not eating some of my favorite things makes me devastatingly sad. I -LOVE- FOOD! For the textures and tastes. I'm also, a picky eater... and while I don't usually let other people know it, I'm kind of a snob about food and how it tastes. So the thought of completely eliminating Gluten- which gives breads and baked goods it's elasticity and softness, makes me a little sad, it's the DAIRY. Oh, my. That might kill me.

Let me explain a little as to my reasons why I am going to attempt what my be my suicide.

MY FAMILY'S HEALTH. This past week of what I thought was a stomach bug {but after speaking with the nurse at the peds office, we don't think it was a bug...} has been AWFUL. My kids have been miserable. Also, {he's going to be pissed I'm telling you this} Jeffrey has IBS sometimes, and really frequently has migraines and headaches. I'm pretty confident, if he were tested, he would have some food sensitivities. He HATES going to the doctor for anything... so if we can become healthier by simply increasing our grocery bill, and decreasing our doctors bills... I'm all in. Our bodies are temples, right? So why poison them slowly and live miserably.

Bailey- we've been a little lax about letting her have gluten and dairy here and there for the past few months. In the past month or so, she has had much more diarrhea, and has thrown up about 5 or 6 times... random waking in the night and puking. Then she feels fine. The dark circles under her eyes have gotten puffy and much worse. She complains about her stomach hurting A LOT more now.

Trevor- pretty much ALWAYS has a stomach ache. He has diarrhea on a regular basis. He was doing a little better with the constant whining. But the past month, it has gone back to what it was before. I don't mean normal 2 year old whining. I mean full on hysterics on an ALL day basis, and a lack of ability to self calm. I'm pretty sure he is malnourished, because he is such a picky eater that he eats like a bird and gets very little fruits and veggies {or meats or beans, or grains...} and I can only sneak so much into a smoothie. His gut is just so messed up, and he is miserable most of the time.

His sensitivities include: Tomatoes, Wheat, Oats, Peanuts, Garlic, Yeast, Soy
It's dang near impossible to feed him, between these and his texture aversions {which he is in feeding therapy for and are improving}.

Callen- is a living garbage disposal, for the most part. His allergy test came back pretty much negative for everything except Oats. So we got excited and started letting him have dairy and gluten, and peanut butter... etc. Well, he has been miserable for the past 2 weeks. Part of that was teething. However, that tooth popped through and he is still not feeling great, or eating great. He threw up this week too. He has been having random bouts of screaming and crying {which is completely abnormal for him}, he broke out in hives three nights ago {but hasn't left the house in a week or tried any new foods}.

Adeline- I'm scared to find out what kind of food issues she might have.

So, in fine, sensitivities tend to take time to manifest, because you have to have enough in your system to cause the reaction. Allergies, tend to have a more instant reaction. My hypothesis- is they are all having reactions to foods they are eating.

While I won't be cutting out ALL of these allergens for everyone... because Trev's limit food choices so much. We will be eliminating Gluten, Dairy, and Soy. Those are the big ones.

This means MUCH more time making things from scratch {to avoid the BHT and other preservatives in processed GF foods}, and because it's MUCH cheaper... I have a mill and can make my own flour.

It means {GASP} experimenting in the kitchen to get recipes to where I want them... I HATE experimenting... I think it's because:

1- if something doesn't taste very good, I can't just make myself eat it... I'll gag.

2- I HAAAATE wasting ingredients and food if it doesn't turn out very good. Then I feel like a jerk, because there are people down the street somewhere literally starving.

It also means, the holidays are going to be much more difficult, since we travel all over town and there are never any foods the kids can eat. So I will pretty much be packing a bag of food for each meal we have to go to... GAH! Not just for holidays, lunches, outings.... I'm exhausted just thinking about it... but I don't feel like I have much of a choice.

It also means, we're going to have to be more ballsy with people instead of giving in for their convenience. We're going to have to stand our ground and hopefully people will have the decency to respect our wishes for our kids health and diets. I mean, if I'm packing all the food they should need, there is no reason not to stick to it, right... since I've done all the hard work for them.

So to all of you who are having to go allergy free as well, here are some blogs and sites that I've found helpful. And PLEASE, if you have found some that you like... share them below in the comments with me. Please don't post them on my facebook page- I will never find them again. If they are in the comments I will be able to keep track of them!

I only know some, and would LOVE any help or resources available.

Adventures of A Gluten Free Mom

Chocolate Covered Katie

The Baking Beauties

Living Without

Thanks so much for reading this heinously long post/rant. Wish us luck! I'll probably post recipes here, when they are good enough to share!

That said, I adapted a banana chocolate chip muffin from a Bob's red mill recipe and it was pretty dang tasty.

This is the original Bob's Red Mill Recipe. You can use it to adapt your own recipes if you want. I made some blueberry muffins from it. Though I doubled the blueberries and left out the pecans. It serves as a good dry base.

Here is my adaptation for the Banana Choc. Chip muffins:


1 egg
1/2 C. vanilla almond milk {or coconut milk would be yum}
2 Tbsp. {heaping} Brown Sugar
3 Tbsp. natural applesauce
2 Tbsp. Flax Meal
1 C. Rice flour
1/2 tsp. sea salt {fine}
1/4 tsp cinnamon
1/4 C. mini choc. chips {I use Enjoy Life brand- for allergy free}
2 tsp. baking powder
splash of vanilla
2 smooshed bananas

Preheat oven to 425. Grease muffin pan {makes 6 full size or 24 minis}.
Mix everything together and spoon in by TBSP. for minis. Bake for 17-20 min. {about 10 for minis}.

Try not to eat them all before your kids wake up from their nap! It took will power! See: 

My intention was to freeze some, to eat later... that didn't happen. 

Thursday, September 13, 2012

 Hello, World!! I'm almost 3 weeks old!
This little lady is GREAT... aside from her massive appetite. She gets that honest. When I'm not starving myself, I eat like a hog. I guess I figure... if I'm going to be hungry all the time, I might as well be skinny too! Except, I've been trying to change my ways, because it's just not healthy, and I'm a BEAST when I don't have food, and my family shouldn't have to put up with that. 

However, I digress.  
 I LOVE baby feet. Seriously. I do. I HATE adult feet. Wouldn't touch 'em with a ten foot pole. I guess because baby feet are so clean and tiny and sweet and adorable. I love this shot. EVEN THOUGH, I cut her heels off and it's centered slightly lower than what I was aiming for... I was holding her so I had my arm stretched out and was pretty much shooting blindly and hoping it would actually be focused AND centered properly. Big demands, I know.
 These two are alright too, I guess... just not what I had in mind. 

 I also love tiny little baby hineys. She has the tiniest hiney I've ever seen. I didn't think you could get any smaller than Trevor's hiney. It was basically a continuation of thighs with a butt crack. Addie, however, has THE tiniest hiney, ever. It's so dang cute. The diaper makes her butt look big, and it was full at the time. Remember how she is a bottomless pit? Yeah, so she pees a lot too.   

 Sweet baby girl. She is so good. Except this afternoon she was apparently starving and not wanting to take a nap.... bad when you're trying to set up some pictures. Callen wouldn't leave her alone... and every time she'd get asleep, the other kids would bang something or scream or cry and wake her up... it was glorious... I'm lying. It was not glorious at all.

She actually does not completely hate belly time. That's great news!
We are adjusting pretty well to having four kids. It's really not so bad. Granted... she is a pretty easy baby, soooo that helps. Our spending has gone down because I avoid shopping at all costs. But, today... we had to go to Walmart. I had put it off too long, aaand she screamed in the Baby Bjorn... the whole way through the store. I got SO many looks... half of pity and half of disdain that I was letting her cry... WHAT THE FREAK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? I didn't have much of a choice. People like that make my blood boil... I used to be that person, B-T-W. Man, have I eaten many entire humble pies over the last 5 years.

Anyways, my eyes are randomly closing involuntarily. So I bid you adieu.

Saturday, September 1, 2012

The New Girl {and her birth story}

 I'm going to apologize now for the lack of editing and many typos. I'm far too lazy right now to bother with re-reading this. Yes, I know they are there. No, I'm not illiterate. I'm just lazy and would rather snuggle my babies.

41 weeks and 3 days {10 days past due}

This little lady {and I do mean little, she is SO tiny!} already likes to make me nuts {as if I don't do that on my own}.

Adeline Elizabeth Shaw, graced us with her presence on August 18, 2012 at 11:12 p.m. via water-birth at Fruitful Vine Birthing Center. She weighed in at a whopping 7lbs. 4oz and 21 inches long {the runt}. She was a full pound less than my smallest baby {Bailey}. Hope Terrell and Shea Cintron were the midwives in for the long haul that weekend. They were awesome. The entire staff at Fruitful vine is pretty much awesome.

Stop reading here if you don't want to hear about the birth. 

Here is the birth story. It shouldn't get TOO yuck... it was fast and furious. Also, I realize you might not care about some of the gory details, but I want to remember what went down so that I can pass it along when she gets old enough to ask. Also, so that when I get baby hungry in a few years, I remember that I don't want to do it again! Here goes... 

Saturday morning {~1:20 a.m.} I was laying on my side and felt a pop. I thought "mmm... was that my water?" I didn't feel any water leakage, so I flipped to my back to get more comfortable and then the water started flowing. Jeffrey was up using the bathroom and threw me a towel so I went and got on the toilet to let it all out. Then decided that I'd just sit in the shower to avoid wearing a maxi pad... those things are awful.

I noticed that it was green and I was pretty sure it was probably meconium  and I started freaking out, thinking I might have to go to the hospital. I called Hope {midwife on call} and sent her a picture. Luckily it was only mild to moderate meconium and she said we were fine, to track contractions and call her around 7am to let her know my progress.

I texted her about 8 am because I had regular contractions until about 3am and then I passed out and hadn't had many since then. The baby had also stopped moving around despite the apple juice, brisk walk and breakfast I'd had. Hope was only about 15 minutes away and stopped by to check things out {God, bless her.}. Everything was fine, I was about 4cm and baby was really low and I was more effaced than the day before. Baby was Sunny Side Up, though, and she needed to turn.

So I took castor oil at her recommendation to get a regular contraction pattern going. I Sat on the toilet a while off and on, sewed a little skirt that coordinated with a onesie, and hemmed a receiving blanket.  Then I took a nap. Then things started to pick up about 3pm. The bishop came over {he lives a few houses down} and helped Jeffrey give me a blessing and we left the house shortly there after to go to the birthing center.

We got there and Hope checked me again and I was about 4.5cm and was very effaced, baby was at +1 or +2 station {I think... I'm already getting details confused}. So, Jeffrey and I got settled and then got bored... and chatted with Hope and Shea a while. Then I'd noticed that my contractions had slowed down. I started walking and jogging {yes, jogging} the halls and they'd come back. I'd sit down to rest... nothin'. They'd stop.

I'd like to add that at this point the irritation on my hiney was downright painful, just from the castor oil alone, let alone the pressure and rubbage from jogging/walking... it was AWFUL. At this point, I'm getting tired and over the pain. Any time I sat down or stopped moving, the contractions stopped. We started alternating Blue and Black Cohosh Tinctures every 15 minutes {they taste like really bad liqour... but altogether bearable. The Castor Oil however, is of the devil. I'm gagging just thinking of it} and that helped keep them coming... until they'd stop again.

Hope checked me again around 9:00 or 9:30p.m. I was at about 5cm but otherwise completely ready. We had a sit down to determine where we wanted to go from there.

I was torn. I was really scared for my ass. Literally, and how awful it would be after delivery... and part of me wanted the epidural just for my rear's sake and to get it over with. I was also physically and emotionally drained at this point. My freaking butt hurt SO, SO, bad. Part of me was terrified to end up in a hospital with whatever doctor might be on call and didn't have the slightest idea who I was, or what I wanted out of my birthing experience. I surely didn't want to stay in the hospital for an extra two days and wrack up those bills just to get neglected treatment.

Jeffrey was getting worried and suggested we give it until 11-11:30pm and if nothing had happened we would go to the hospital. He also suggested that I stop walking the halls and relax in the tub for a little while... which sounded heavenly at this point, but I didn't want to be the slacker who wasn't pulling her weight to get that kid out.

I got in the tub and Shea {midwifery student} started the tinctures again and we listened to some Enya and tried to relax.

Around 10:00 p.m. I started having contractions... fairly good ones. Around 10:45 p.m. I started feeling some pressure so hope checked me and I was at 6cm and she could easily feel the baby's head. I asked her how much longer she thought it'd be. She said probably within the hour because of the strength of the contractions I was having.

I went to the bathroom, and really felt pressure and almost like I needed to push. I made Jeffrey get them and asked them if that's even possible to go from 6-10cm in an hour... and they said they've seen it in minutes. So I thought, "Oh shit, I should get back in the tub SOON."

I got in the tub. Started feeling some serious contractions and loooootttttssss of pressure. Oh MY GOSSSHHHHH!! I had to start pushing. I pushed for about 1 minute... oh geez, ring of fire! A few pushes and out came baby... little Adeline... and I mean LITTLE. She was so tiny. She still is. She has some SERIOUSLY scrawny chicken legs.

She did eventually turn, thankfully {during about a 15 minute long contraction}. The transitional period was QUICK but I was able to manage {and cuss a whole lot less, but screamed louder, apparently}  because there were very short breaks in between contractions and pushes. I used them to ground myself and breath and calm myself. So in that respect it was easier and less intense than Callen's. Callen was easier to push out for some reason. Probably because my body pretty much convulsed him out on it's own. With Addie, I was making a conscious controlled effort to push her out and was aware of everything I was feeling. But it still seemed like more work and harder to get her out, even though she was almost 2 pounds smaller.

Recovery would have been amazing if my butt hadn't gotten tore up.  Talk about PAIN. Forget any pain in the ladyland {which I didn't have}. It was the literal pain in my ass. THAT, was dang near unbearable. In fact, it was at least a week before I felt ANY relief. I was so worried about my bum, that without any shame I called my best friends dad {who is a proctologist} to ask him what I should do. But I know you don't want to hear about that nastiness, and I don't want to relive it. EVER. Desperate times.... desperate measures.

When I start getting baby hungry in a few years... Jeffrey's job is to remind me how awful the pain and castor oil was. Did you get that Mr. Shaw? Ugh. The Castor Oil. Have you ever tasted it? IT'S REVOLTING. Seriously, I took one sip, right as Jeffrey walked in the kitchen and I started to gag over the sink... he looked at me like I was crazy. He almost got punched. The worst part, is once you get it down... you burp it up AAALLLLLLL day long... so then you have to try to hold it down every single time.

Awful. Pure evil.

Anyhow, for all of you who like the gory details... there you are, I did leave a lot of it out {the gory stuff}... but you get the gist.

Sweet Adeline... I'd do it all again for you... you are so sweet and sleepy. Best baby so far. Keep up the good work, lovey.

Post Note: YES. Yes, I did go through and edit out a lot of the grammatical mistakes. I couldn't stand it. There are still plenty, though. 

Thursday, August 16, 2012



Oh my goodness. I've been waiting and dreaming of this day for SO long... and I totally cried in the car. It's really hard to just drop your baby off and trust that it's going to go well! I felt like I needed to hand her a book on my kid and everything she does and doesn't do and need. In Pre-K she had an awesome teacher that put up with me getting a daily rundown. There isn't time for that when you drop them off or pick them up here. Too many kids are around. I guess that's what parent teacher conferences are for. Bailey was nervous and scared.  She is the most social person on the planet and is rarely intimidated. I gave her a pep talk and she started doing her sticker activity after she put her backpack in her cubby. She did fine and had a good day. They toured the school, read a couple of books, played on the playground, had snack, had a quick rest time... the usual.

She HAD to have this backpack she saw on Zulily. She was SOOOO excited when it came!

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

IgG Test Results

I paid the small fortune for the boys to have this sensitivity panel done, it only covers 97 foods, but I figured that was probably adequate {and half the price}. I'm tired of guessing why they have upset stomachs. I got the results back today. The were bittersweet.

Let me explain. There are 4 classes 0,1,2,3.

1's are mild things you should moderate and watch.
2's are moderate things you shouldn't have all the time but are usually okay on occasion {depending on the reaction you have to them}.
3's are a severe sensitivity {not yet an allergy though} and you should just avoid them altogether for a while and see if you're body builds up a tolerance.

Callen's results shocked me.

He had a heaping handful of 1's, and only one 2- Oats, no threes!!
So his soy and casein allergy, he has outgrown. Granted some things that bother his tummy came back as 0's... so we will watch those. Also, at his age, his allergies will change in the next year most likely. But for now, YAHOO!!!

Trevor, God bless that boy... I cried over his. He just recently finally started eating peanut butter, and at therapy started eating bread... he also recently decided to start eating apples, grapes, and fish sticks. He's been doing awesome!

His results... once again, I cried.

He had a heaping handful of 1's {including apples and honey... two staples}
2's included: Cashew, Garlic, Cow's Milk, Tomato, Wheat, Brewer's yeast
3's included: Oats, Peanuts, Soybean, Baker's yeast

The good news is, Casein was negative and he can eat cheese, yogurt, and cottage cheese.. the rest of the dairy is fine, just not the milk.

The bad news is the yeast, wheat, oats, soybean, and peanuts.... all staples in his diet.
Even the breading of chicken nuggets contain dry yeast and wheat... and pretty much everything has some form of soybean... soy lecithin or soybean oil.

LOADS of fun. I guess I'm just going to have to take extra time and make things homemade... so that they can have the things they like without the things that make them sick.

Bailey will have the test done eventually, I'm just too chicken to get more bad news, and it's a small fortune. We started reintroducing gluten and casein, but she has had some upset stomachs, and even thrown up lately... so I just don't know.

So YAY for new challenges, as if there aren't enough of those already.  YAY for more people thinking I'm crazy and that it's not a big deal for my kids to avoid the foods that make them sick.

But for real, YAY for blogs by people who have been through and are currently going through worse. At least these are sensitivities... even if they make us miserable at times... they aren't deathly allergic and for that, I'm most definitely grateful. There is something to be said for pioneers, regardless of what they are the pioneer of!

Monterey Chicken

Raise your hand if you've ever had the Monterey Chicken from Chili's?

{If you're hand is not raised, raise it now and slap yourself... you deserve it.}

It is DELISH. I don't do a lot of cooking these days, mostly because I lack creativity and don't get around to thinking about it until it's beyond time. So, last week I had some chicken breasts thawed out that needed to be used and I don't know why, but it hit me... HULLO..... why not make this... it's such an easy dish.

I'd love to provide you with a recipe, but I kind of just threw crap together... Here's the best I can do:

I cooked bacon until it was crispy crispy {the best way to eat it anyway...}

Sprinkled Paula Dean's House seasoning salt on the breasts.. the chickens, not mine. {my go to seasoning salt... i make it in bulk... it's somewhere on this blog...}

Brushed on some barbecue sauce... for this dish I like a sweet one... I think I used Kraft Hickory Sweet {or something, I'd go look in the fridge... but I'm lazy and carrying extra baggage, and it's just not going happen.}

Then I added some colby/monterey jack shredded cheese.

Tossed on some chopped tomatoes, chives, 

and topped with bacon, I prefer the bacon to been chopped up, but once again.. I was lazy and dinner was already late, so I left it in bigger pieces.

Put it in the oven at 350 or 375 for about 20 minutes or so, until the chicken is done.

Take it out and let it sit for a few minutes {this allows the juices to steep and keeps the chicken moist and tender inside... instead of dried and tough... and who wants dried, tough breasts?}

While that's cooking... make your rice.

I just experimented with this... it wasn't bad, but could have used more flavor-flave.

I used Instant brown rice, added some salsa, black beans, salt and pepper... and let it cook.

Plopped it on the plate, put a chicken breast on top of it and VOILA!

Yummy dinner that was pretty quick and easy.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Not so much fun.

Well, I know this section of the blog is called Photo FUN... but there isn't much of that going on right now... my 50 mm lens broke... well was broken... by Callen. I thought it was out of his devious little grasp... but it seemed to make it to the floor okay. I'm ordering another one... so hopefully by the time this baby comes I'll have lots of new pics to post :) Thanks for being patient with all the wordy posts lacking pictures! I know they are boring... sorry about that.


I didn't think the drive thru of Chick-fil-a would be so bad on their "appreciation day". I left the house about 15-20 minutes early for the kids therapies. Trevor is currently working on chicken {in the NON chicken nugget form}. Since I was a slacker and didn't get the chance to cook a chicken breast, I figured, I would swing by Chick-fil-a and grab a 4 pc. grilled nugget... I needed grilled chicken, dang it! On THE MOST inconvenient day of the year... the drive through was a good 1-2 hour wait.

THAT did not happen. Which stunk... because none of us had eaten lunch and they were so excited to go, and we were going to be late for therapy, and he had no food to eat... which negates therapy. So McDonalds it was for a grilled chicken breast {1/2 of one actually, but it was only $1.30...}. 

So I promised the kids we'd go to Chick-fil-a the next day. This means, I'm going to be miserable essentially. 

The way it normally goes:

We walk in- they run through the restaurant straight to the play area {the whole reason they love the place}. Callen squirms because he wants to go to. I have to chase them down so I can keep track of them and they don't get abducted. Then we have to wait in line... and they are playing and laughing and screaming and yelling when they get mad. Bailey is talking to every and any stranger who will listen... Trevor is running through the restaurant because he thinks he's funny. We order, they complain because they didn't get chocolate milk {allergies}. We sit down... Trevor throws a mother lovin' fit {hatin' really, let's be honest} because he wanted nuggets {not grilled ones, fried ones}. Bailey fills up on fries and lemonade and eats little to no chicken. They take so long to eat that they don't get to play for but a few minutes because I'm about to lose my flippin' mind and the whole place is going to get to see.... so we hurry and leave while I chase them down again and/or drag them out. I lose my mind in the car... but at least the whole restaurant doesn't see it. 

The way it went today:

We walk in. They stand next to me taking it in. Bailey politely asks if they can go play, so I say yes {it wasn't too crowded}. Callen sits on my hip patiently while we wait. I order, go sit down. The food comes, I set it up, go  get them from the play area, they sit down and down some lemonaide. Bailey starts eating her nuggets {they aren't getting fries until they eat them} and so does Trev {and Callen}. I broke Trev's in half, put it on the fork, dipped it in honey and put it in his mouth... he didn't fight me. He just knew he would get to go play some more if he ate them. {This is an ENORMOUS victory, I can't begin to tell you...} Callen is sitting semi-quietly, except for an occasional sqwuak for more food, not trying to climb out of the high chair... as per usual. Bailey doesn't want to finish her nuggets, but does when I ask her. When she is finished she nicely asks to go play. Trevor finishes his last bite of nugget and eats a few fries and goes to play. I finish feeding Callen and then order for myself. Eat my food, go get them a little while later... they don't fight, scream or complain. They come and get their shoes on. Trev pulls his pants down and announces that he's pooping... awesome {time to potty train that boy!} so we go to the car, get in, change his diaper, buckle and head home. 

THAT... is pure mercy from above. That NEVER happens. It's because I'm 11 months pregnant... and still have a good 2 weeks left, despite my due date {Aug. 8}. Heavenly Father decided he'd give me a decent outing. 

So I came home and made some potty charts for Trev and Bailey {she forgets to wipe, flush and wash her hands... a lot... not always all three, but at least 1-2 each time}. I just couldn't find any that were exactly what I needed. There is something to be said for customization. 

Days like this I feel like I've conquered motherhood. {Though, days like this only happen once every month or so... if I'm lucky.}

Tuesday, July 24, 2012


Oooooh Man! I'm pretty excited about this! So, funny story.
I'm sitting in bed on a Friday night {a few weeks back} trying to wrack my non-existent brains for ideas for something I'm working on, and I'm just lacking inspiration completely.

I say a little prayer for inspiration so that I can complete this project... it still hasn't come yet.


Then I got a GREAT idea, that clearly, could not have come from me... not right now anyway. I'm exhausted and pregnant, and lacking most brain power.

My mind wandered.... and wandered... {yes, it does that A LOT} and I started groaning to myself inside about how tomorrow is Saturday and there is SO much to get done... and none of it can really get done until the kids are napping... which means, we have to entertain them until that time...


It's that simple.

Let me say it again. BINGO!

I made bingo games for Bailey and Trevor. Since they can't read yet, I put pictures of things they can do and then they can bring me their card and I can either hole punch it or put a sticker on it , cross it off, whatever we want, when it's complete. They had to fill up a row and then they could pick a Netflix show.

I get so sick of them just watching TV all the time. I try to limit it to 2 hours a day total. I must admit though, I've been really dependent on it lately, because I'm just so exhausted all the time... you know, typical, I'm-about-to-pop-a-baby-out, exhaustion. Anyway, we actually had a productive Saturday instead of letting it waste away in front of the TV.

I just made a table in my word processor, adjusted the size of the cells, added pictures I found online, and a text box with the text. Super easy.

Monday, July 23, 2012

Pill Poppin' Momma

Man, it's getting close. Though, not close enough, and WAY to close, all at the same time. 38 weeks.

Have I mentioned that I'm pretty much terrified of having four small kids? I mean, that was the plan, eventually, but when 3 of them are under 3 years old... that's A LOT.

You'd think by now, I'd have a routine down and remember what all I'm supposed to be doing, but I just don't.

I forget how much of what to take and when to take it...

For example, starting from the second trimester on I take Red Raspberry Leaf Tea caplets {even though  I have a good 1/2 a pound of tea leaves... I just HATE the taste of tea, and I can't do it anymore}.

RRLT is used to strengthen the uterine muscles. I started taking it when I was pregnant with Trevor, because I was worried about another post partum hemorrhage, like I had with Bailey. A couple of friends told me about it, so I did some research and decided it was worth a try. Basically, it makes your uterus contract a lot more, thereby strengthening the muscles and toning the uterus... which then makes your real contractions much more efficient. It's also great after you have the baby for getting your belly and uterus back to normal. I swear by the stuff... obviously, or I wouldn't have just preached for an hour about it.

Once I hit 36ish weeks, I start taking a labor supplement called 5W, by Natures Sunshine. I SWEAR this helped. I took it with Callen, because by child #3 I had figured out that my body is not one that prepares on it's own. The labor contractions with him were SO MUCH MORE BEARABLE, than with the other two, and my labor was half the length it was with Trevor, and I'm pretty confident that this stuff is why. It's the only thing I did differently while pregnant with Trev and Cal.

Well, I lied. I forgot about Evening Primrose Oil. This is used to help soften and ripen the cervix {NOT by dilating it}. By having your cervix already ripe and ready to go, it can also help shorten your labor, because it's easier to dilate and doesn't have to do the extra work to soften and everything. You can take it orally or vaginally, I do both... because I need all the help I can get.

It's a lot to keep track of, and pretty much a pain... but it's worth it to me, and I wouldn't do it if I weren't confident that they help. Of course, no doctor is going to okay these things because it's not FDA approved... but my midwives recommend them, and I say... why not try something from nature. Didn't Heavenly Father give us everything we would need in nature, from one source or another. Anyhow, that's my two cents.

Let's hope this one comes a little earlier. I've already had one Acupuncture treatment... and another on Saturday. Here's hoping for a less than 42 week baby!

Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Mastering Our Emotions

I have most definitely not mastered my emotions. In fact, I have a hard time controlling them. It's probably why my kids turn into little tyrants when they get upset about something. It's something I am constantly working to improve and to teach them to better control their emotions.

I just read this article by Nicholeen at Teaching Self-Government. It's a great site and she has some really great insight.
How to Control Your Emotions

Take a go at it and let me know what you think!

Monday, July 16, 2012

Booty Call!

We were at a family get together on Saturday. Trevor {yes, him, again} came in from the kiddie pool and before I could get a diaper on his naked-as-a-jay-bird self, bent over and shook his booty and boyhood for all to see, while singing this little ditty, "booty, booty, booty!" over and over again. He then gave personal performances to everyone in the room. I about died inside. He's lucky he's so dang cute.

He learned this little song and dance from none other than.... Bailey. Of course, she did/does it with clothes on. He didn't get that memo.

I should have videoed it for future blackmail purposes. C'est Lavie.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

It's a Hokey Hump Day!

Aside from ALL of the kids waking up at least once, and Trev staying up for a few hours... They at least slept in until 7am. Yes, I said SLEPT IN... until 7 am.

So far, the shenanigan's are plentiful.

1. I walk away for a split second and hear the door open. {Big shocker, it's Trev's favorite new past time}. I go outside to find he and Callen {almost}, in the sprinkler.

2. While I'm taking off Trev's wet clothes in the bathroom, I come out and Callen is at the dining room table, helping himself to the "krice krispies" that Trevor didn't finish... So I put him in his chair and let him have at it... why waste it, right... yeah, when I go to get him out... he's covered. SO, I put him in the bath tub. Then Trev wanted in... sure, why not.

3. Both boys laugh and run butt smack neckid {yes, neckid, not naked}, through the house before I can get diapers on them. But, that's nothing new... cutest neckid hiney's ever.

So now we are current.... stay tuned for the rest of the festivities... I'm sure they'll be abounding! Good thing I'm too exhausted to waste my time yelling at them.

4. We are on the way to my midwives appointment, and his new favorite thing is unbuckling his car seat. No, not the 5 belt harness... he just pulls his arms through that part... I mean, the seatbelt that holds his car seat on the seat. You heard me. I have no idea how he reaches that thing while buckled in the harness. Luckily, we weren't even out of our neighborhood, yet.

5. We are at my midwives appointment {36 weeks now... SO, not close enough and yet waaayy too close}, and Trev runs out the door and hides before I can get up and get to him.... searched all over, and down at the peds office next door. Finally, they find him under the furtherest desk in the midwives office. Repeat story, a little later on, except he was in the blinds down in the sick waiting room, of the peds office. THEN, as we are getting ready to leave, he runs through the birthing rooms {not occupied, thank heaven's} and I caught him as he was closing the laundry room doors to hide.

6. On the way home, mid route, Trevor, yet again, unbuckles the seatbelt. So my big, hurting, fat pregnant arse, has to pull over, unbuckle, and climb to the back of the van, hunch over and re-buckle his devious self... AGAIN.


Happy Friggin' Wednesday people.

P.S. If anyone has ideas on HOW to discipline for the actions... I'll take what I can get. Spankings don't phase him, neither does time out... at all. He also doesn't understand the dangerousness of his actions.

And to think, I have two more children to go through the Two's with. Shit.

I am A Child of God.

"I am a child of God.
And He has sent me here.
Has given me, an earthly home,
with parents kind and dear."
{I always laugh inside when I'm singing that line... because most of the time, my poor kids don't see the kind part of me lately.}

"Lead me, guide me.
Walk beside me.
Help me find the way.
Teach me all that I must know,
to live with him some day."

The verses to the next two are:

"I am a Child of God,
And so my needs are great.
Help me to understand his words,
before it grows too late."


"I am a child of God.
Rich blessings are in store.
If I but learn to do his will,
I'll live with him once more."

{Note: I completely forgot there used to be more verses, until I found this video.}

This is a primary song that I sing to my kids, A LOT... like multiple times a day, especially the babies. I didn't realize how much, until the other day, when I was rocking Trevor {it's his FAVORITE}. He sang almost every word of all three versus with me. I about peed my pants... and not because there is a baby on my bladder.

 It's one I've heard literally since I was born. It really grounds me. It is a beautiful song. It reminds me that not only are my kids small, they are tender and of the utmost importance to my Heavenly Father. They are still learning, and it's MY job to teach them. Not to belittle them or yell at them or lose my temper {which happens far, far, too often}.

Not only does it ground me and remind me that THEY are little and still learning and not purposely out to make my life difficult and miserable; it reminds me that to my Heavenly Father, I am still immature, still learning {most definitely, because lately, things have been ROUGH over here...}, and still in need of His help, teaching, patience and most definitely, His mercy.

This song, reminds me of who I am. I know I've said this before, but it's relevant, so I'll share again. My Papa used to tell me EVERY single time I would leave his house, "Remember who you are." I would always reply back with a "Kylee Suzanne Newton" and a smirk. I'm 99% sure, he thought I was being sarcastic... but I wasn't. It wasn't until I was an adult that it clicked and I REALLY realized exactly what he meant. No, I'm not kidding... I can be that dense, sometimes. I miss that man SO much.

We are ALL children of a loving Heavenly Father. One who wants more than anything for us to be happy, and return to him. I had never thought of this song in this way before, but as I am lying in my bed trying to fall back asleep at 2:30 a.m., I was thinking about a comment, my friend Holly left me on my Who is She, post... and my wheels got to spinning and somehow ended up here.

This song answers the questions that everyone wants to know.
1. Who am I?
2. Where did I come from?
3. Where am I going?

1. I am a child of God.
2. God lives in Heaven and I'm his child, he has sent me from there to here on earth.
3. He wants me to live so that I can return to him someday.

So, SO, simple {not easy... SIMPLE}... I tend to over complicate EVERYTHING. That's probably why it's taken me 28 years to think of it in such an obvious matter.

I guess, I figure, that of all the things I want them to remember, it's the message of this song. Even if someday they fall away from the Church, I want them to know that they are more valuable than they will ever possibly realize. They are not alone. They have a purpose. They are loved. They are literally of divine nature. They are literally a child of GOD, this makes them more royal than any king or queen on earth.

And there it is folks, the point of the post... bet you never thought I'd get there. Whatever, man... it's 3:30 a.m. I'm gonna be in trouble tomorrow... but I wanted to get my thoughts out before I {and so I could} fall back asleep and forgot them.

So, try a little harder to be a little better. Remember, He sent His son to atone for us, so He would know our sorrows and joys. So that we can repent and start fresh every day {or for some of us... every half hour}.

Remember who you are.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

June Bugs

For Father's Day, I had big plans to make Jeffrey some gifts involving pictures of the kids. That junk did not pan out. Not much of anything has been panning out for me lately. Anyway, I made the kids go out and play so I could snap a few updated shots. I never did get his gifts made {but that's okay, he's pretty satisfied with his IPAD}.

Here are some updated pictures of the kids, though... per his request that I haven't posted any in a while.

Not the greatest, but if you KNEW what little turds they were being.... you'd realize this was an accomplishment. Also, why there isn't one of them all together... that junk is for the pros... I don't have the patience!


Wow. It feels like forever! I have had SO many technical difficulties, I don't know if you would believe me if I listed them.

 Mainly, my computer was gone for 11+ days to apple to get fixed. When I got it home, it looked shiny and new, but the main problem I sent it in for, was not fixed. LAME LAME LAME. Needless to say, I was pretty flipping livid. Of course, apple took care of everything... by noon the next day the problem was fixed. So I basically got a new computer, at no cost to me. That part was awesome, and a huge blessing.

Now, I've had no internet for about 3 days or so. Finally, after this recurring problem every month or so, we got a new wireless router... so keep your fingers crossed!!

We have had a new technology addition to our family as well. Jeffrey entered the WOKV father's day IPAD drawing. HE WON!! Pretty cool.

I am not gonna lie, I was more than a little jealous. I wouldn't even look at it for a couple of days. For good reason... I knew I'd love it. I didn't want to tease myself. It was glorious. It's a shame they cost so stinkin' much, that thing would be a great mommy planner/kid educator/ kid entertainer. I'd have one for the kids in a HEARTBEAT... and by the kids... I mean me.

So. We are up and running... though I won't be running until the thing they call a baby, but is more like a ninja beating me to death from the inside out, gets the freak out and stops sucking the life out of me.

We are not on speaking terms right now... heh. She is hurting me bad. Sticks that little butt right up in my ribs causing a throbbing/piercing pain that radiates from my ribs, deep into my shoulder blade. I don't complain TOO much about pain. I typically just deal with it, but this crap is MISERABLE. Worse than any of the others... {I always have the knots in my shoulder blades... this is different}.

Anyhow, I've been taking pictures and have had lots of blog ideas, so don't go anywhere, I'm still alive and kickin'!

Wednesday, June 27, 2012


At therapy yesterday, I was taking Trevor's pacifier so he could go eat his chicken with Ms. Jill {which he did, all of it!}, and I saw that there were two huge holes at the base {compliments of teething Callen}. I mean, this thing was literally hanging on by one side of silicone... and I don't need any choking hazards. So, I had him go put it in the trash. Yeah. He didn't understand that it wasn't coming back, and last night was ROUGH, to say the least when reality set in. Especially, since Callen's paci had disappeared {probably left in the waiting room}. Trevor wouldn't eat dinner and screamed and cried through that and bath time. It was so sad. He literally couldn't calm himself down and was making himself sick. Finally, he asked for me. So I go grab him and we sit in the rocking chair and I sing him every primary song I could think of, off of the top of my head. He eventually calmed down... I wasn't sure if he was asleep or not, because he kept huffing. You know, the kind of inhale you involuntarily take after you've been sobbing for a while. So I laid him down in his bed, and sure enough, that sweet boy was passed out cold, but still heaving in his sleep. I fully expected it to be a long and rough night for both of us.

He slept ALL night long, until about 7:00am, which for him, is sleeping in. Many prayers went up in his favor last night. They were definitely answered. This morning he came and got into bed with me and was whining for his paci and I told him that the paci was gone and couldn't come back. I told him what a big boy he was, and that he didn't even need that paci last night.  Then, I told him that daddy had fixed netflix and he could watch Diego... so he went and sat on the couch and waited. He hasn't mentioned his paci again, yet. That in and of itself, is not normal. He usually whines and cries for hours when he is without it, unless he is distracted.

So here goes de-pacification. Hopefully, it continues to go this smoothly!